So today I am having a very bad day.
I turn 26 tomorrow. Im living in a foreign country where I don’t know anyone. I don’t have a job I like and I’m still struggling to find someone who gets me. To find my other half….or just find a good friend.
Now most people have bad days….
But this is how my bad feels:
Now people let me explain to you what is happening to me right now.
I get so insanely depressed that I feel like I can’t move. It feels like if I stand I am going to just fall over and pass out. I have an insane stomach ache. I feel like I’m just too dizzy and distracted and irritated by everything.
This then brings out my health anxiety. I am now getting thoughts like, “Im going to die”. “All these symptoms must mean something”. “I have a health condition I don’t know about”
So BAM BITCHES! JUST LIKE MAGIC HERE I AM!
The crazy-addled lunatic you see before you.
AND THE WORST PART IS THAT ALL THIS CRAZINESS IS FOR NOTHING!
We can’t tell anyone about this because if we do we will be ridiculed, judged, and misunderstood.
WHAT THE FUCK RIGHT? I believe they call that ‘adding salt to the wound’….. those fuckers.
SO WHAT TO DO NOW?
I mean its just us you guys. We need to be there for each other. I NEED SOME INSPIRATION…. no no, WE ALL NEED SOME INSPIRATION!
lets do this shit.
Oh yes my dears, there be a storm a brewing out there!
But we can do this! We are a strong and sturdy group of swashbucklers. Oh yes…. this aint be our first rodeo no sir!
We must commandeer a vessel!
Ah she shall do! We shall name her The Albatross. Because the albatross is a commonly misconceived omen of bad luck when in reality what the story states is that the albatross is an omen of good luck at sea… killing the albatross in a desperate attempt to show ones masculinity is what caused the downfall of the crew. (get it? its misunderstood like us… god i should totally be an author or something)
Sail on bitches, sail on!
Time for a musical number about how cabin fever has ravaged our minds and caused us to go crazy (When in reality we all know thats bullshit because we were totally crazy before we went out to sea)
Now if you’ll all look to the left, you’ll see all the commoners in a sinking ship. Thats right, they’re not able to handle the stormy seas that we are forced to live with everyday. So go ahead, stick up your middle finger and shout cunt as loud as you can! …im sure they’ll be fine
Ah yes, rough seas will always give way to a sunny day. And because we did it together as a crew we made it. Safe, happy, secure.
Remember everyone, stick in there. Be there for each other and always remember when you’re having a bad day, it will always get better. Im already feeling better having written that post!
~ The Dark Horse
and no this was not proof read! I was in a state of mental distress! HOW AM I EXPECTED TO PROOF READ WHEN IM CRAZY? HHHHHMMMM?????