Being INFJ (Or, Oh sweet thing, yes being INFJ will make your life tough, but damn it can also make it beautiful)


Well bitches, I’m back.   I was alone during the holidays…. both New Years and Christmas… and so I was a miserable Grinch who wanted nothing more than to bring about the destruction of the human race.  So i decided I needed a little inspiration and thought I’d look into what it meant to be INFJ again.

Long story short, never knew about the Myers Briggs until about December 2013 when I had to take the entire 4 billion question test as part of my assessment for therapy, and since then I have really learned a lot and have found great comfort in knowing I’m not alone out there.

So quick breakdown for those of you who may be having your first INFJ experience in learning about yourself.

INFJ: These four little letters will change your life, for we make up only 1 to 1.5 percent of the human population.  We are the eternal oddballs.


This is our ability to see through…. well, everything and everyone.   Do you know that feeling you get when you just know someone is lying?   Or maybe it isn’t even that extreme.  Say you’ve been on a date and you can tell the other person isn’t in to you?  You ask them if they need to go or if everything is ok and they keep saying yes but you know better. You literally can FEEL that they have their things on their mind (and of course, just as you suspected, you never hear from them ever again) Has this ever happened to anyone?    Or when you see politicians talk in a debate and you just look and listen to what they’re saying and you’re like…no….nooo…NNNOOOOOOO YOURE SOOOO PANDERING TO THE PUBLIC IM ONTO YOU!

Well this is our intuition.  And I’m sorry to tell you this kiddos but we have the best intuition of all the humans on the planet… and it will never go away.  That gut instinct you get will never go away.  It is out curse and our blessing.


(Does anyone else feel like they may perhaps be a black sheep?)



This is the shit that really makes the INFJ an INFJ. This is our ability to not only grasp and understand reality, and simultaneously see the spin that the commoners put on it to suit their own selfish needs, but this is where we then think further.  Understanding that everyone sees things in a different light isn’t good enough for us.  We have to ask why: Is this ok?  Could life be better if certain people saw things in a different way?  Who is the real winner in these situations? Why don’t you just do things for the good of humanity rather than for your selfish desires?   We then take this knowledge and preach.   Hence the extroverted feeling.  We must extrovertly express our feelings.  This is why so many INFJ’s because counselors, teachers, authors, public figures, and activists.  We must speak!



Have any of you ever been called aloof or distant, or my personal favorite, has anyone every said to you something like, “Your head is stuck in the clouds, or, you think you’re better than other people”.  This is due to our introverted thinking.  Before we can vocally preach we must take time to introvertedly think.   Our power to preach comes from the energy around us, where our power to think comes from inside.  It is our flame.  Our never ending inner spirit.  This is what makes INFJ’s so awesome.  We could be locked in a prison kept away from the world but our desire to direct, to find solutions, and to help will never die.   We can not be held down.  As part of this, we see big picture versus small picture as well.

If you’re INFJ you may notice that in a lot of conversations where two people may be saying something like,

Person 1: “Oh my God you know I really try to be a good person”

Person 2: “Oh my God, me too.  Like, I just want everyone to chill and be happy”

In your head you’re probably thinking “OK BITCHES FOR STARTERS, you’re both wearing clothes made from slave labour in China. You’re using iPhones made from slave labour in China, all I ever see you do is take selfies of yourselves and post them to instagram or snapchat which shows your self-obsession and possible self-delusion, not to mention you totally judge everyone around you, work for a large corporation that rapes the world of its resources, and you never question the ideals of capitalism which are completely ruthless and only favor those who are already wealthy”

On the outside you’re being very quiet.  You’re in your stage of think, process, conclude, and figure out how to tell the world this without making everyone hate you.

Again… I’ve said this before and I will say it again, being INFJ is a blessing and a curse.  It will definitely never make your life easy.  its about using your skills to rock out in this world.  Not to hide them under a rock.




This is the true glory of the INFJ.  This is where we once again see the split.   the blending of introversion and extroversion.


Like the galaxy swirling and colliding, our introverted and extroverted selves mix like a beautiful choreographed symphony.   Ever see the movie divergent?  Well, we literally are divergent.

This is our ability to still live in the world around us.  Where most personality types either are lost in thought or consumed by the cheap thrills around them we get both.  We know how to dream up worlds, but we also are able to see around us.  We are able to see how to create these worlds in our current time and space.

We are the movers and the shakers.  We are INFJ.



We are rare.  Like really really really rare.  Our brain doesn’t function like most people’s.   WHICH IS AWESOME AND SPECIAL 


it also makes us prone to certain things though.   Being misunderstood, loneliness, depression, anxiety, feeling trapped.  These are all common when you are INFJ because you literally are so rare. This isn’t in your head people.  You’re not just making it up that you feel like the outcast all the time.  Like I said above, we only make up 1 percent of the human population!  THAT IS CRAZY! 

So you have the choice:  Rock out in life, or fall to the dark side.

I hope NONE OF YOU do that because you are too special to waste.

Always remember you’re not alone and you can be anything you want.  We are INFJ, we are fucking awesome!

~ The Dark Horse


(was the proof read?  eh…. like 50/50 give me a break!)

8 thoughts on “Being INFJ (Or, Oh sweet thing, yes being INFJ will make your life tough, but damn it can also make it beautiful)

  1. INFJ .. Maybe one lol Awesome post wonder why people can’t get it, see through the flakes you made me laugh this Sunday morning thanks for sharing. Let the truth be told!

  2. I’m curious if you have found it to be common for a fellow INFJ to either dislike or to simply not be attracted to others of their own personality type? Love your content by the way!

    1. hey good question! I actually wouldn’t know. Sadly, I have never been in love. I do however think it’s very possible. Check out my other INFJ post, I talk about how INFJ’s can go in two very directions.
      For example, Rosa Parks and Hitler are both INFJ’s.
      INFJ can swing in such radically different directions that
      yes, I can see it being very hard for us all to get along haha!

      1. Thanks for the reply! I’ve only recently discovered my personality is INFJ and am having such a good time learning about us. So many things make sense now that didn’t before. I’m learning how to take better care of myself which is also so exciting. Your article on INFJ’s and travel particularly resonates with me as it has become one of my most cherished hobbies. 👍

      2. Travel has literally saved my life so many times. Trust me, it’s a great hobby. I know this is going to sound sooooo cheezy, but I actually just bought the book Eat, Pray, Love because I love her story. I know everyone bashes her, but she was a single woman who ran off to Bali (before Bali was as developed as it is now) I think she’s brave and I’m excited to get some inspiration from her story!

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