Category Archives: celebrity

Changes I Hope To See In The Jagged Little Pill Musical

Jagged Little Pill

So, over the summer, Jagged Little Pill premiered at Harvard, and I’ve just discovered it’s going to be on Broadway in the Fall.  WOOHOO!!!!

Let’s get this out of the way right now… The music IS FUCKIN’ AMAZING!  I am a huge Alanis fan and love her music and this musical was everything I could have ever wanted music-wise.

Unfortunately though…the plot was… errrr…um… pretty shit.

The musical focuses on a family and all the problems they have in the Post-Trump era. The musical has only one rounded character (meaning a character that isn’t just a one-dimensional walking stereotype) and that’s the mom who is part of America’s opioid crisis. SHE IS A FUCKING AMAZING ACTRESS WITH AN AMAZING VOICE. The Tony goes to…


Aside from her the problems begin, and let’s dive into them here..

The daughter…

jagged little pill 1

Celia Gooding plays the daughter Frankie, who is black and adopted by a white family. She is also a wonderful actress with a powerful voice. However, her storyline is just fucking crap. She blames every single thing in her life on being black.

Frankie is dating a…I don’t know…the musical doesn’t actually give clear signals about this.  In the beginning you assume Frankie is dating another girl, a tomboy type lesbian. But as the play goes on it’s revealed that her girlfriend doesn’t like being called a girl. Whether it’s a story about her being trans or just gender nonconforming is unknown, all we know is that anytime someone addressed the partner as a girl, the partner has a mental breakdown and runs of crying… (so there’s another problem)

Anyways, so Frankie cheats on her partner with a cis-man. Her partner finds out and gets mad at Frankie, and Frankie is like, “You don’t understand! I’m black in a white family. You don’t know what I go through!”

Dear Jagged Little Pill Musical, I know you want to be all woke, but being black isn’t an excuse for cheating on someone… This play feels like it was written by a bunch of really entitled white people who know nothing about oppression and just thought that all these people’s problems could be sourced from their minority status.  It doesn’t work that way.

jagged 3

Later in the play Frankie runs away from New York City because she “feels” (With absolutely no proof, because she comes from a very privileged family who love her) that her family doesn’t love her because she’s black.

When her parents find out, once again Frankie goes, “You don’t understand what it’s like to black!” and the whole family is like, “OMG You’re right! How could we be so stupid?”

Once again, Jagged Little Pill musical… THINK ABOUT THIS ONE…

If you were a parent and you had just discovered your child had ran away, you’re not going to be like, “Oh but she’s black…I guess we gotta understand that she’ll never truly feel loved… oh well..”  NO





By having the parents be like…. “whatevz, black gurl gonna’ do what she do” only makes it seem like they actually don’t love her.


This brings me to Frankie’s Partner:

jagged 4

Frankie’s gender-unknown partner is just a fuckin’ punching bag the entire show. Someone at school calls her a girl so she cries and mopes and walks away. Her mom tells her to be more like a girl, then she mopes and walks off stage, and then Frankie cheats on her, and she sings You Oughta Know, and the whole audience goes batshit fuckin’ crazy over it…and I’m like….NOOOOOOOOO. NO. NO. NO. This character is such a weak pushover that she doesn’t deserve a stand ovation.  Whether she’s trans or just non-conforming, she still needs to be a human. She needs self agency. She can’t just run around stage crying and being sad the entire fucking play. Give me something more please? 


And then… oh lord, there’s the girl who gets raped at a party.

jagged 5

So this girl gets raped at a party, and of course nobody believes her. Because nobody ever believes women….. And she’s mentally ruined and thinks about suicide and all that stuff, and you know everything ever is the fault of men. And then there’s a rally held for her to inspire her and show her that she’s loved… and people on stage are holding up #METOO signs and #TIMESUP signs, and then randomly these black people come on stage and start waving around #BLACKLIVESMATTER posters, and Im like…. A white girl was raped… why is this turning into a black lives matter moment? 

The point is this, This show victimizes women, victimizes black people, and victimizes the trans (or non-binary…it’s never stated) so heavily, that it’s unreal.  It’s like, White men are bad, and everything that ever happens to anyone is IS COMPLETELY THE FAULT OF WHITE MEN.

Have you ever seen that sketch on SNL about liberal high school kids trying to make a play with meaning, but it just comes off as offensively stupid?


Jagged Little Pill the musical feels like that a lot.

Me and my friend had literal moments during the show when we had to hold back laughter because it was just so….bad.  Like literally, it was as if the creators of the show had concept of reality.

And I’m not the only one who thinks this, check this quote from The New York Times,

“At least for now, this well intentioned and intermittently thrilling musical makes you want to applaud its efforts at “wokeness” while also wondering if wokeness has become just another form of virtue signaling. It feels like what might have happened if the Tribe from “Hair” had actually made it to college”

Or this quote from Variety,

The real downside is that with so much going on, our interest and empathy are unreasonably stretched.

Or this from the Patriot Ledge,

It’s a lot of heavy stuff to digest and after two-and-half hours, Cody wraps up the conflicts as if to mimic a Shakespearean finale. She ties together the ends of plot strands perhaps too neatly to be believed.



In the meantime, check out a song from the cast recording that was just released, Ive been playing it on loop in the shower:


~ The Dark Horse

(Not proofread #Sowwyz!)


Feeling Alive Again. Or, Courtney Act on Big Brother Has Brought Me Back From The Dead



So, I don’t know how many people out there keep up with the UK telly, but something amazing was just going down on what is normally a generic and trashy reality show.

The 21st season of Big Brother in the UK just concluded and that shit was bloody brilliant! As an American, I didn’t know much about the show except that Courtney Act was going to be on the show.  Now, I’ll say, if I were 15 years old, I would have watched that show every night of the damn week.

You see, as a teenager, I used to love Big Brother….And you know what, I should probably have a Big Brother breakdown here for everyone, because Big Brother is completely different in every country around the world.



Here in the US, Big Brother used to be like a fucking marathon event.  The show was on, for no joke, almost 3 months. That means that everyone who made it into the top 7 got to stay for the entire 3 month period, whether it’s in the house, or the sequester house.  I know that in other countries, the show is only on for about a month. And then sometimes those Celebrity Big Brother seasons are only like 3 or 4 weeks.

Anyways, so as the gay kid in Ohio who was beat up and made fun of constantly, Big Brother seemed like a dream come true. It was this house filled with all these hot fun people, AND THEY WERE LOCKED IN WITH YOU….FOR 3 FUCKING MONTHS! 

It just seemed like the ultimate way to make friends. You could be close to all these people, and you were never alone. The hot jock would have to get to know you because you were sharing a room. The pretty cheerleading type would become your friend because an alliance needed to be formed. The wise old woman who’s been through shit could give you advice all damn day because you’re sharing a house together.  It all just seemed so perfect! I was sure that the reason I was alone all the time was because nobody ever took the time to get to know me.  But, if they were locked in a house with me for three months they’d have to!  It would be like one big family at summer camp!

So anyhoo, I used to watch the show religiously. All the episodes.  They’d have the Sunday, and Tuesday, shows and the Thursday live eviction show.  I used to fantasize about being the house with them. Watching all these people share a bedroom, share a shower, share the hot tub, share everything.  For someone who was alone all the time, Big Brother was fuckin wet dream for me. I loved the idea of having people in my life…even if they did potentially want to vote me out of the house. I used to stay up in bed at night, fantasizing that I was a member in the house too; making friends, and living life to the fullest.  I used to love the hope and excitement I felt watching that show, feeling that some exciting adventure was just around the corner!


But as I got older, the show lost it’s luster. I stopped thinking that every new person was a potential friend. My heart hardened. Walls were built to protect myself. I stopped watching the show.


But, something with this new season began to attract my attention. I started seeing news articles creep up about something incredible happening in the Big Brother House. This season of UKCBB (United Kingdom Celebrity Big Brother) was titled “Year of the women” because this year marks 100 years of women having the right to vote in the UK. The show was already leaning towards a discussion of gender, and threw in 2 extra dimensions into the storyline.



The first was India, The UK’s first trans woman to be a part of a news team.



And the second was Shane J / Courtney Act, a drag artist who was previously famous from Australian Idol back in the mid-2000’s (which Shane did in drag as Courtney and pioneered the way for others) and then more famously, Ru Paul’s Drag Race.



And then to counteract all of this, they also brought in ultra-conservative politician and super crotchety old woman, Ann Widdecombe.




So, sparks started to fly because India was just god-awful, and Ann was just an old dusty bitch.   But the entire house, and all of the UK began to fall in love with Courtney.  She had multiple conversations with everyone in the house about gender, sexuality, and performance. She was willing to talk to anyone about the differences between drag, and trans. The difference between gay and pansexual, and the difference between gender and biological sex.

She even took to debating Ann about some of the more conservative and Anti-gay policies she helped enact back during her time in parliament. But what made Courtney so amazing was her ability to always remain calm, collected, and willing to engage in any  conversation that may have come up.



And everyone loved it.  She was the house favorite, and the entire nation fell in love with her for knowledge, self confidence, and beauty.  The UK as a whole even started a national conversation on gender because of what was going down on the show. She wasn’t just teaching the other housemates, but she was teaching an entire country, and thanks to the internet, the entire world!


So this is first part of where I started feeling myself wake up inside. There’s just something about Courtney Act that I need to be more like. I need to carry myself with her confidence. I need to walk into a room and actually feel like I belong.  Somehow, even though Courtney Act tends to look like a slutty drag queen Barbie, she ends up being the shining light in every situation she’s in.  I need to have the self love and respect that she has.



Furthermore, during the season, Courtney Act managed to school everyone on gender and sexuality.  She not only carries herself well, but she is phenomenal in conversations. She took what could have been some very difficult and controversial moments, and spoke to housemates about them as if it were just the most natural thing to her. I need to be better at communicating with others.  

Check out Courtney given’ the boys a lesson on Drag and Trans:



So yeah, I’m a guy, and I have never done drag, but damn, there’s so much to learn from Courtney Act.



Secondly, there was a bit of a show romance happing in the show as well! There’s an insanely cute guy on the show named Andrew Brady (He was on the UK Apprentice or whatever…)


So get this…. from the very first second Courtney Act walks into the Big Brother house, he’s in love with her.


And from there… a Bromance/Romance began!

They started getting really close, and Andrew was constantly flirting with Courtney Act.

Throughout the show the “friendship” grew and grew…..



And then, as time went on, Andrew started like Shane, even out of drag… for a gay boy like me, it was like magic was happening.  A hot straight guy was getting along with a man who, out of drag, was an effeminate guy, and in drag was….well, a drag queen.  It was so amazing to see Andrew form this friendship and not care about labels or what other people may think.  He was just himself, and Courtney was just herself…and they connected.  It was amazing and heartwarming to watch.



Oh my God…. they even had tub time one night!  It was fuckin’ amazing!  So yeah…that fifteen year old inside me who used to watch Big Brother hoping to find an amazingly close friendship… well, he felt super pleased watching this season.  I get those butterflies in my stomach again watching this season, just like I used to when I was a teenager. I find myself laying up in bed at night again, imaging myself in the house….Imagining some handsome straight guy was becoming my friend, and was having tub time with me too! I get this rush watching this season… a rush I haven’t felt in such a long time.  The rush of youthful excitement and passion and hope for some great adventure.  And ya know, I’ve missed that feeling…and I’m glad it’s back!


And You know what, everyone noticed that she was a shining light as well… because she won!


Watch the win here:


But look, I think we can all be winners here.  I think we can all learn a lot about being your true self and letting yourself shine, even if your true self is something that the common man might find odd or different.  Courtney went into that house and literally changed people’s minds about the LGBTQ community and that is fucking amazing!   Let’s all try to be beautiful, engaging, and inspiring people! 


~ The Dark Horse






Lady Dynamite (Or, That Show You Should Totally Be Watching!)


stand-up comedian (and personal favorite of mine) Maria Bamford has released a show on Netflix and its fucking amazing.    Its hilarious in all the good ways and also is stunningly true to mental illness.

Its called LADY DYNAMITE and its on Netlflix.

There are so many parts in this show where Im watching and going…. “holy fuck she’s nailed it right on the head!”.


Now I hate spoilers so Im not going to give anything away.  Ill just give a real brief, broad, and vague overview of the show.  It takes place in three time periods.  The “Past” where Maria Bamford rose to success as a stand up, got her big gig as the crazy Target lady, and appeared on TV shows.  The show also focuses on “Duluth”.  Her hometown that she returns to during her stay in an institution and her recovery back home.   And then it also deals with the “Present” which is about her life currently (and is also the most fictionalized portion).




Now what really makes this show so insanely special to me is that I don’t watch it going “oh the downfall of another person with mental problems….how sad”.   I watch it with absolute joy.  I resonate, relate, enjoy, and empathize with Maria Bamford.  And its so much sweeter because she is such a great person.   Its about her living with mental illness, not failing with mental illness.

There are points where I go “Dude, thats totally happened to me”.   and “Fuck ya Ive been there” and “Yep…thats exactly how people treat me”.    But never ever and I’m crying over it like some sappy drama.  Instead I’m laughing.   I just want to walk into my TV and give her a big pat on the back and laugh about it!



Now again I can’t keep talking about the show because I don’t want to give away any specific plot points or anything because I hate spoiling it for people!  What I will say is to YouTube search her as well.   She has done some really amazing and hilarious interviews about mental illness that I think are great and will probably give you a good laugh!

~ The dark Horse







We Can All Make Friends And Find Love (And I Can Give You Proof)


So when I get really depressed I start feeling like I’ll never find happiness. Like i’ll never find my group or find love.   Like life will always be shit…. but then I think about the facts:

Even shitty people somehow find companions throughout life… so surely so can I! 


Take this pile of trash for example.  Ok I will admit I’m not too knowledgable about the Kardashians but here’s my best shot

Top left we have….. I have no idea.  A random Sister.

Below her we have Kim Kardashian.  She got famous for making a sex tape, being married for 3 days, and now being married to Kanye West (I think I could safely say she is one of the worlds most annoying humans and is probably personally responsible for the downfall of our culture).

In the middle there we have Kris Jenner who got famous for being married to some famous lawyer in the OJ Simpson case.  Then she married random olympic guy from the 80’s Bruce Jenner (who has sense made a small transition you may be aware of)….and now she’s just like a really trashy mom.

Below her is I believe Chloe Kardashian?  And she’s really famous for Snapchat and Instagram?

I don’t know the other two.  I know there another sister named Courtney but with a K?



The point is, look:   This is probably one of the trashiest, most shameless, pathetic, celebrity-obsessed families in existence and look!!!!!! PEOPLE LOVE THEM! 

If Whats-her-name Kardashian can get like 19 million follows on Instagram or whatever surely I can find 5 good friends in life.

And really how many more do we need?   I would love it if I could just find one great group of friends, and maybe fall in love….get swept off my feet…. that would be nice right?

And in reality that means all I have to do is find 6 people in a world of something like 7.6 billion or so?  (Fact check needed for that number)


No bitch, but Im sure your entire family is.

Who even is that one? I swear to God they just throw random Kardashian-look-alikes on screen and pawn it off thats its just one family, like how they used to swap the Olsen twins out on Full House.


Seriously… they’re convicted felons.    We got this bitches.   Seriously, if they can get people in their lives, then so can we dammit!


So what do we do to get out of our funks and find friends?

~Well Ive started doing bar trivia with a Meetup group and I think its actually really fun!   I recommend trying that site! 

~ Tinder anyone?     Look….I know its shallow and disgusting but the fact is our generation has become straight up retarded.  They literally don’t know how to interact with strangers in public anymore.

Woman will assume all men are preying on them, and will assume all other women are bitches.

Men will assume all girls are trashy sluts and are looking to be used, and other men are competition.

We sadly live in a world where to meet new people it seems like it has to be done online.

~ Try joining a sports team?  (ugh…. I hate that one because literally EVERYONE tells you “Oh join a sports team” when you tell them you have no friends…. I’m like BITCH LISTEN I grew up as the gay kid in Ohio….. I assure the Football jocks were the ones beating me up and therefore I don’t really have a desire to play fucking sports)

But hey…. if you’re into sports go for it why not?

~ Make friends at your work break-room? 

~ If you’re in school join clubs!   talk to classmates!   Force yourself into your roommates plans!  I will assure you that peoples willingness to talk to strangers drops by like 99% when school ends so therefore you are in the best possible place to make new friends! 



Feeling down?  just remember…..



This bitch somehow managed to get a TV show, make millions, get married, have kids, and gain one of the largest celebrity followings in history. 

If she can do that we can literally do anything.

~The Dark Horse







Dear Zac Efron (Or, The Power Of Bitching)


Dear Zac Efron,

I just wanted to let you know that I’ve been lusting after you for a long time…. I mean… looking at you for a long time now.  Fuck that doesn’t sound any less creepy.   Ive been….admiring?   No no thats all just creepy.

Looking at shirtless picture of you online?

Watch Hairspray religiously?

Keeping your Rolling Stones issue under my bed?

……ugh…. I don’t think Im sounding any less like a creep.

Anyways, the main reason Im writing this letter is because I’m just doing some venting.   When you’re feeling down its always good to sometimes just vent and rant and get it all out of your system.  And since I love and loathe you I think you’re a good person to let my frustrations out on!


Oh Zac, I sometimes look out the window longingly and think of how much I want you, but also hate you.

Like your big annoying muscles and adorable little chest hairs…God those bother me.  I mean who wants a young guy with pecs and a happy trail?  not me……haha…ha… ha… ugh.. (sigh).

Or that little grin you have?  Have you ever looked at it in the mirror?


You have? ….oh, yeah… I guess I look at your grin a lot too.

Oh yeah well how about that annoying way you lick your lips….. how stupid.


Oh God I melt when I look at you.

I mean I cringe!  Thats right!   You big hunky mans man that also has a sensitive side that could cuddle bunnies while fighting off lions!

you make me sick.

Remember your shoot for Mens Health?


Look at you lift that log with your big hunka-hunka biceps. I’ve done that before too you know!

Well… it was more of a stick-like twig I suppose but still, the point is stop thinking you’re better than me cuz you’re not!

Whats that?  You think Im crazy?   CRAZY?  … LITTLE OLD ME? (insert creepy smile)

No Mr. Efron crazy would be me kidnapping you and bringing you to some abandoned lodge in the middle of the woods and then tie and you up and have some 50 Shades Of Grey type love affair.  NOW THATS CRAZY! 


Oh Zac what can I say, I’m a lover not a fighter.  Im just releasing some frustration.  Sometimes you just gotta rant and blow off some steam.   Get the juices pumping so you can refocus and start getting your head on straight again.

And I feel like you’re a good person to rant at because you’re all famous, attractive, rich, and have a life full of friends and adventure, so if I say some shit it isn’t really hurting anyone.

Plus you’re a good person to rant at because once you’re locked in my basement nobody can ever know what i say about you anyways ha…ha…hahaha..MWUAHAHAHAHAH! (sexy wink)


Oh welll, I suppose I’ll be seeing you soon, when you least expect it

Love Always,

~ The Dark Horse

(So how about you guys reading this?  Who would be your favorite celebrity that you would write a ranting letter to whether it be good or bad?   Or potentially a bit creepy?)