Category Archives: holiday

Thanksgiving Travel Is Upon Us: Let The Hunger Games Begin!

hunger games
Ok so, I absolutely love holiday travel – As I’ve stated in previous posts. And people, this shit just keeps on gettin’ better!

Now, according to weather services all around the country, massive storms will be sweeping through America, JUST IN TIME FOR THANKSGIVING TRAVEL!

And all I can say is, YES! YES! YES! 

This means delays, long lines, angry passengers! Oh, it’s all just too much fun!  And now there’s the chance of having snow on top of it?  I’M SORRY, HAVE I DIED AND GONE TO HEAVEN? 

This is going to turn into a real-life Plane, Trains, and Automobiles!

planes trains and automobiles

Do you know someone on Wikipedia actually charted the route they took from in the movie?

Planes_trains_automobiles_route_map

Oh man, it’s just all way too amazing. Have I ever told you about the time I had to run through the Denver airport to make a connection on my way home for Christmas? Denver had a massive snowstorm, and all the Frontier flights coming in got delayed. And since Frontier’s passengers are almost entirely transferring, it meant that out entire plane (including me) as well as every. single. other. Frontier. plane. was going to miss our connecting flights.

So, the airline held all the departing planes back and waited for us. People, I kid you not! The flight attendants had us line up in the aisles AS THE PLANE WAS LANDING in order of whose gate was furthest from ours. (For those who don’t know, Denver airport’s B terminal is about a half-miles long) The second we hit the gate, they flung the door open and one of the flight attendants was literally yelling, “Go! Go! Go!”

home alone airport

It was a dream come true! I got to have a real-life Home Alone airport scene moment, and it was glorious!

So, what will this year hold? Perhaps I’ll watch a family have a holiday meltdown in the security line? Or disgruntled passengers like Steve Martin in Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, yelling at gate agents!

steve martin

The holidays are just too much fun!

To anyone out there who wants some advice to make your trip a little easier, it’s this:

You’re fucked. Your ticket is already booked. The storms are coming. And AAA is predicting that this will be one of the busiest Thanksgiving travel seasons ever. You’re forced to deal with it now bitches! Mwuahahahahahaha!!!!!!!

Just learn to enjoy it!  I’ll be blogging my entire journey home, so feel free to touch-base here on the blog if you need some motivation to keep going!

THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN, RIGHT?!!?!

~ The Dark Horse

I’m So Excited for The Holidays, I Can’t Handle It!

kid on christmas

So, I’ve found a new apartment, I’ve gotten my deposit back, and I’ll be moving out of my awful apartment on December 1st. Now, I can finally get back to what I really want to be doing right now… FREAKING OUT ABOUT THE HOLIDAYS!

OH, SWEET HOLY HONEY ON HIGH! I literally love the holidays so much it might actually be unhealthy.

kristin wiig

Oh my lord. I just can’t.  So, now that I’m a travel a writer, the holidays have gotten EVEN better. You know how every year you see stories like, “AAA released how busy the roads will be this holiday” and “Priceline lists the top Thanksgiving travel destinations of 2019”? Well, I have always LOVED those stories. I scroll through Google news endlessly, all through November and December, reading news about holiday travel. I’m obsessed with the madness! The hustle! The bustle!

And now… I GET TO BE THE ONE WHO WRITES THOSE STORIES!  When I saw the email from AAA earlier this week with their annual holiday forecast, I literally almost died. I was like… OMG this is my dream come true. I finally get to WRITE an article on the AAA Thanksgiving forecast! (They’re projecting about 51 million Americans will be traveling this Thanksgiving!)

 

Oh lord…. this is too much. I’m too excited. I can’t breathe!   Oh no! I’m hyperventilating!

excited SNL

Am I only person who goes on Google Maps, turns on the 3D mode, and then looks at airports around the country, dreaming of the absolute chaos that must be going on inside them during the holidays?

Is there anything better than knowing that after your exhausting day at the airport, you can go home, to food that was cooked by someone else, towels that were washed by someone else, and best of all… now that I live in New York, there is NOTHING BETTER than going to bed in a quiet house on a quiet street. You don’t get silence like that in NYC, so it feels simply magical when I go home!

kristin wiig excited

Oh god, I’m too excited! Ok, I’m going to make myself a chamomile tea and take a warm shower.

~ The Dark Horse

(No, this wasn’t proofread, this was written through pure holiday mania!)

How to Handle Being Alone on a Holiday

nyc

The 4th of July is tomorrow, and I’m still recovering from how horrible I felt during Pride. I was already left on the sidelines for one major celebration, and now, just three days later, I’m going to have to spend yet another celebration alone.

So, what to do? I know one thing is for sure, I’m not going to repeat what I did for Pride. Trying to hide away from the world, just waiting for it to end, did not go well for me. It wasn’t healthy or fun. This time I’m going to take a different approach.

the th

 

THE PLAN:

1.) For starters, I’m going to try to be in public as much as possible. Whether it’s reading and journaling in a cafe, walking through Central Park, hitting the gym, wandering around a Barnes and Noble, literally, ANYTHING. The goal is to minimize loneliness as much as possible…which is going to be hard. Already, the city has emptied out, with everyone heading out to Fire Island, Long Island, Westchester, or back home to wherever they’re from. This is something I’ve noticed from living on the East Coast – these people somehow have unlimited funds to travel home. How is that? They take mini-vacations ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

2.) I’m going to eat out somewhere, even if it’s Chipotle. Sitting in my apartment cooking will only make me more sad. On days when you’re vulnerable to a breakdown, don’t risk it. Head out. Let someone else cook for you, let someone else clean up after you, and again, it keeps you out in public.

3.) I’m gonna sleep in.  That’s right motherfuckers. No alarm tomorrow. I’m waking up when I damn well please.

4.) I’m going to call home. I’ll check in on my parents and my grandma. Even though I can’t be with them on the holiday, maybe just being able to hear their voices will help make me feel a little more at home.

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So that’s my plan so far. Anyone else got any good ideas of what you do when you’re alone on holidays?

Anyhoo, hopefully some of these work for you too. Cheers to a better, brighter, less lonely holiday!

 

~ The Dark Horse

The Post-Christmas Blues

win

 

So, this time of year is always the same.

After the rush. After the hustle and bustle. After all the lights, the music, the food, comes the quiet.

The silence.

The after-Christmas nothingness.  And I fucking hate it.

 

Everyone has gone back to their own lives, taking their presents and their presence with them.

And life seems to slow to a halt. The magic is all used up. And somehow, everyone seems to be so ok with it.

Everyone besides me seems to love when Christmas is over. “I’m exhausted” they say. “I’m broke” they complain. “The holidays are always so stressful” they shout.

But me, I feel differently.  I love the holidays.  The love the busyness.  I love everything about the rush. And I can’t help but feel a little down every December 26th. It actually shocks me how quickly the world can move on from it.

win1

At least for my family, we have one day a year when everyone gets together. We have one day a year when we eat a meal together. We have one day a year when we can surprise each other with gifts…

But somehow, even this one single day seems to be too much time for my family.

Christmas seems to be an inconvenience more than a holiday.

We hit a new record this year: My aunt arrived at about 6pm Christmas Eve. Stayed till around midnight. Then came back Christmas morning for one hour to say goodbye, and grab her presents.  That’s a total of 7 hours. How many hours are in a year?

8760.

And she could only spare 7?

7 is 0.079908675799087% of 8760

That’s how much time I got to spend with my aunt this year…

 

win3

 

If I ever find love in my life, the person needs to come from a huge family. I want to experience a real Christmas sometime. Where spare rooms rooms are filled with family members. Where Christmas dinner is a feast. Where opening presents is a cherished and ornate spectacle.  I hate this rushed and sloppy Christmas that my family has.

I hate that my family treats the holidays like a burden.

And shortly after my aunt left, my brother and his girlfriend left. And the day after Christmas, my mom and dad were back to work. And I’m left wondering why I invested all this time and energy to fly home from Boston just to be surrounded for one day by people who could care less, and now… surrounded by nothingness.

I assure you, I think Boston is lame, and I’m so excited to start my new job in New York after the new year. But there is way more to do in Boston than Ohio. I’d much rather be spending my time off from school and work in a city like Boston where I could be doing things… I came home for family, and it seems like none of them care.

win6

 

But, even though this sucks, I’m going to try and keep my spirits high.

I have a new job that I’m really excited about in a new city… and not just any city, but New York City. I have so much to look forward to in 2019. 

I’m going to be finishing up my thesis, working towards to completing a book that I hope to get published. I’m going to start working for an awesome media company. I have so much going on in my future.  And I won’t let this post-holiday sadness derail me from my excitement.

So,

Yes, the holidays sucked this year .

 

But, ya know what, fuck 2018.  2019, here I come! 

2019

 

~ The Dark Horse

The Highs and the Lows: Riding The Emotional Wave

nyc

So, I just got back last night from New York City. I was there for an interview.

Yes. Someone actually thought I was good enough to be interviewed in New York City. (I can’t believe it either, trust me)

So, anyways, it goes like this. I was here alone for Thanksgiving break. The entire city clears out because Boston is one of those places where people move to, not someplace where they’re from. So the city is empty. It’s 10 degrees F, everything is closed. And I’m alone.

I feel like shit.

Until….

I get an email. 

nyc1

This email is to inform me that I have an interview, for a very large company. A media company. A media company whose offices are in a very trendy building with other very trendy companies in a very trendy part of town.

So, my dread turns to intense anxiety and joy, and I head to NYC as fast as I can…

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So,  wind up in a hotel, next to Bryant Park,

during the holiday season

in New York City.

It was like a movie.

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I ate sweets as I watched ice skaters while Christmas jazz played, with the Empire State Building in the background.

I got donuts, I went to New York delis, I got amazing Chinese food. I walked fifth Ave. and Central Park.

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It was like life had gone from zero to hero. Finally, I had a real tangible piece of evidence to prove that I was making something of myself. An interview. (This was actually my second interview…the first was via phone). So, it was like a MEGA self-esteem boost to see that someone thought I was good enough. And not just someone, but a fuckin huge awesome company.

 

So then the day came. The interview. OMG people it was amazing. The office was amazing. And it was located in an awesome building. As someone who had grown up working retail and restaurants, and being told constantly that I’ll never get anywhere… THIS WAS FUCKING HUGE!!!!!

I hope the interview went well. I would love the job. I would love to live in New York. I would love to have a chance to show the world my skills. To show the world that I do mean something.

So, I walked out of my interview, and got myself a tea at a trendy little cafe.

bakery

(I couldn’t write a post about NYC and not reference Sex and the City….cmon people!)

 

 

But now, Im back in Boston. The interview is over. The whirlwind is over. And It’s like someone has slammed on the brakes again.

And I have this feeling in my throat. Like a weight, pulling me down. A weight saying YOU KNOW YOU’RE MEANT FOR THAT LIFE. YOU KNOW YOU’RE MEANT TO TAKE ON THE WORLD. YOU DON’T LIKE YOUR LIFE BEING SLOW BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT A SLOW PERSON! YOU WANT TO LIVE IN THE FAST LANE AND THAT’S OK! YOU SHOULD! 

I’ve spent too long listening to people. Too long listening to anyone and everyone who’s willing to spend their time putting me down. Telling me I can’t. Telling me I have no talent. Telling me I’m worth nothing.

But GOD FUCKING DAMN I CAN’T ANYMORE.

nyc4

 

Every time I get these little tastes of a life I like, the voice in my head gets louder and louder. It keeps telling me this is where I belong.

It keeps telling me that I AM ALLOWED TO DREAM. That I am allowed to fight for a good life.

I’m allowed to have friends

I’m allowed to fall in love

I’m allowed to have a career I love

If I feel like I want a high profile job then listen up MOTHERFUCKERS… I CAN!

AND WE ALL CAN. FUCK ANYONE WHO TRIES TO KEEP YOU DOWN.

I read a great quote the other day that said something like, “The only people who try to put you down are those who are already beneath you.”

So boys and girls, let’s find out nicest clothes, polish up our self-esteem, brew a little confidence and rock out our best Carrie Bradshaw

carrie

 

PS – Ive never actually watched Sex and the City…is it even good?

 

~ The Dark Horse 

 

Another PS- I also never proofread. Oh well.

 

Anyone Else Going To Be Alone On Thanksgiving?

FUCKTHANKSGIVING

Ah yes, it’s that time of year again! The leaves are almost gone, the first hints of Christmas pepper the atmosphere with a hint of glee, the rouge cranberries can be seen in even the most forgotten of grocery store aisles. This can mean only one thing, It’s almost Thanksgiving!

And, thanks to a country with INSANE flight prices (Dear America, do you know how cheap it is to fly in Europe?) I’ll be stuck in Boston for Thanksgiving… yay. 😦

However, I’m trying to make the best of this. Obviously, when you’re a depressed person, being alone over the holidays is horrible. In fact suicide rates actually INCREASE during the holidays. So, in order to not be sad, I’m compiling a list of:

 

Why I’m grateful to not be going home this Thanksgiving: 

 

1.) My mother can’t cook anyways. Look, my mother is a saint, salt of the Earth that one…. but as a cook? … Well, I mean, let’s just say this. Thanksgiving for us always consisted of overly-dry turkey. Green beans from a can, jello-d cranberry sauce from a can, gravy from a dry-packet mix, corn from a can, bread from the store, pumpkin pie from the store, and “mashed potatoes” if you can call them that. It was basically potatoes boiled down so much that they had lost all structural integrity. It was like picking up a spoonful of flavorless foam. This Thanksgiving, perhaps I can make myself good food now?

turkey

 

 

2.) I’m in Boston. Surely the Black Friday shopping here will be much better than it would have been in Ohio.  I mean, Walmart and Best Buy? Oh, please, let the trailer trash have their fun. I’m going to go stalk the sales at Gucci and Canada Goose. Get some real deals from real stores. PS- I literally don’t have the money to shop anyways, and I’m sure Gucci doesn’t do Black Friday deals anyways… but at least I can window shop for deals at the fanciest of places I can’t afford right? Perhaps I’ll buy a pair of socks.

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3.) Can you imagine what the airports will look like anyways? Do I really want to be crammed in a flight full TOC people? (TOC is Thanksgiving Or Christmas, they’re the people who only fly once a year at most, either for T or C. And Therefore they’re completely lost in the process; move slow, breathe through their mouths, trip, bump into walls, fart constantly, and so forth…) Then the plane will be filled with screaming babies, and people with their Panda Express smelling up the whole plane.

No thanks!

flight

 

4.) I’m literally going home for Christmas in a little over a month anyways. Sure, this will be a super lonely week, but you know what, I’m going to get to experience all the fun and joy of hectic holiday travel in one month. I CAN DO THIS! ONE MONTH.

just say it.

ONE MONTH

ONE MONTH

ONE MONTH!

HomeAloneAirport

 

 

5.) Thanksgiving is deadly anyways! Have you ever heard of a movie called Thankskilling?

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Why, Thanksgiving is downright dangerous! I should be thankful I’m not able to go home and experience the atrocities that await.

killing1

 

Now that’s what I call Murder Most Foul  (Rimshot please!)

 

~ The Dark Horse