Tag Archives: fun

Spring Playlist to Destroy the Winter Blues

pink

 

So, if you’re like me, then winter brings you down… a lot.  I have depression and anxiety, and I always have to work on on keeping myself mentally healthy. And winter is always the fucking hardest.

I love Christmas. The lights, the music, the food, how busy the world is… but then suddenly comes January and February.

No sun.

It’s freezing.

No holidays in sight.

Everyone is sick.

FUCK WINTER. 

FUCK IT INTO THE FUCKING GROUND.

But now, it’s spring. We are above freezing (sometimes only by a few degrees, but IT’S PROGRESS PEOPLE, COME ON!) And I’m getting myself all worked up for better weather, longer days, and the adventure that fills the sir of spring and summer.

I’ve crafted a kick-ass playlist that makes me smile, makes me happy, and gives me energy. This playlist screams SPRING IS HERE! 

If you’re looking for some good tunes to help bring you out of your winter hole, give these tunes a spin!

 

18 WHEELER

P!nk

When you need to just really kick some fuckin ass in the shower, turn on Pink’s 18 Wheeler. I’m lucky to have a window in my bathroom.  With this song, on weekend mornings, I like to hop in the shower after my morning tea and roll up the blinds so the morning sun has illuminated my bathroom, and THEN I BLAST THIS SHIT TILL THE BASS FALLS OUT. Nobody brings out your inner-rebellious teenager like pink.

 

NTH DEGREE

Morningwood

This is one of those songs that’s so great because it’s totally inappropriate. Just remember…

M O

M O R

M O R N I N G

M O – M O R- M O R N I N G W O O D TO THE NTH DEGREE!!!!!!

 

PORTLAND, OREGON

Jack White and Loretta Lynn

I hate that Loretta Lynn is a Trump supporter. But, you gotta give her credit for being 86 years old and still crankin’ out records and touring.  Also, this song is so good because it feels just like spring. The song starts of slow, and then builds and builds into the honkey tonk-infused tune that always gets me singing along.

 

BREAKFAST

Kelis

I’ll be honest with everyone, I didn’t like Kelis very much. I thought she was kinda trashy. But then her album Food came out, and I was blown away.  Here, she removes all that synth-hip-hop shit and just sings. And it’s beautiful.  The culmination of the song comes when she sings the line “Maybe we’ll make it to breakfast.” And I’m just like, YESSSSSSSS!  Maybe she’ll make it to breakfast, and maybe we’ll make it to spring!

 

1979

Smashing Pumpkins

This song brings back memories of warmer months as a kid in the 90’s. And it’s funny because 1979 is Billy Corgan singing about the dog days of his childhood, and this song came out in my childhood…so, it’s like…the circle of life or some shit like that.

Point is, the song envois images of youth, and hope for the future. Prefect for spring!

 

Storms in Africa Parts 1 & 2

Enya

I listen to these songs every single spring, and have ever since I was 15. The songs are about the African rainy season, when torrential thunderstorms bring water and life back to a parched region. This song always reminds me of spring rains. April showers do bring May flowers after all. I always love the energy of a spring storm. It’s like mother nature defibrillating herself back to life.

BETTER LIFE

Keith Urban

For anyone who has read this blog, you know I love running away/  And this song always inspire me to run again. The purity, the energy, and the hope of being young. The idea that adventure is everywhere. The belief that life is fun.

What can be more spring-like than that?

HALLOWEEN, Lets make it fun again.

Halloween

For anyone out there who feels like life sucks, or that life isn’t what it used to be.  There is one simple solution this October… MAKE HALLOWEEN FUN AGAIN!

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays!   It’s exciting, it’s scary, and it’s fun.

How can you make it fun as well?

Alright well here is what I do:

1.)  FILL THE MONTH OF OCTOBER WITH HALLOWEEN MOVIES! 

might is suggest the ever-classic Hocus Pocus?

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or the classic slasher (some might say the ORIGINAL slasher, actually)  The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

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Perhaps you’re more of a SciFi/Horror person?

Alien?  Cant go wrong there!

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OH! OH! OH! What about the much-forgotten horror sci-fi EVENT HORIZON??? its amazing!

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The point is, fill your month with Halloween classics!  Really get yourself in the mood! Other great options are Behind the Mask, Scream, and Halloween!

How about baking?  Caramel apples and pumpkin pie are great ways to make fall feel like fall AND it gives you something to do. It’s a creative outlet, and its will taste amazing!

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NEED SOMETHING EVEN CRAZIER????

Have you tried Ghost hunting?   Im going ghost hunting for the first ever in a few weeks and I’m soooooo excited and will probably shit my pants, but maybe you need something extreme like that to get the juices flowing again?

Or something simple.  Dress up and go to a party.   Don’t have any friends, or don’t like parties?  Then dress up at home and make your yard look crazy!   You may not be able to trick or treat (WHICH IS SO STUPID!  I THINK EVERYONE SHOULD GO TRICK-OR-TREATING AT ANY AGE) but as you hand out candy you can still have some of the fun!

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this girl got into the spirit and dressed up as Lil Kim…. what a bad choice, but oh well its HALLOWEEN!

Ok ok, and at the very least, watch The Faculty.  My 90s horror obsession is SURE to please everyone who watches.  Cheesy, fun, campy, and loaded with stars!

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Oh yea, i just turned this post into my Faculty Obsession!     WATCH IT, BITCHES!

Peace Out, The Dark Horse

Moving Past Being An “Anxious Person”

forwrd

So, I have good news, and some odd and confusing news.  

So i guess lately Ive been thinking about the “next step” in my life.  Where Im going after Australia, and Im starting to think about how great it would be to fall in love and make friends and have adventures.   And I’m thinking less and less and less about ‘how will i survive this day with my anxiety’.  

Am I moving BEYOND anxiety?   Am I actually becoming the person I used to be and not even knowing it?

 

…. no….no that isn’t right…. that must be what is different…. I’m NOT THE OLD ME. 

I don’t let things bother me like I used to.  i don’t respond to situations the same way.  I’m learning  to be better.  Im learning to better myself.  Im learning to not hate myself for being so different.  Im learning to love myself.   Im learning how stand in my own shoes and set fire to anyone who doesn’t like that. 

stardust

Like Robert De Niro from Stardust Im gonna rock that freak flag!  WHY THE FUCK NOT RIGHT? 

So What, maybe I had no friends in high school, but I’ve seen the Northern Lights.

Maybe, Ive never been to a concert, but I have swam with wild manatees, dolphins, and sharks in Florida (For real…It was actually a little dangerous) 

And maybe I’ve never been in love, but I have lived in a foreign country.

 

And you know what?  I’ve met a lot of people along the way.  The good, the bad, and the ugly.  And dammit, Im still here.  So fuck you people if you think I’m weird, I LOVE IT

So put on your best Michele Pfeiffer “Imma fuck shit up” face, and well….. fuck shit up (in the good way) 

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Ready To Run, Or, When Life Needs A Shake Down

run

Im at that moment where Im just ready to run.

The past month has kind of sucked, and I was trying to deny it.  I was so proud of myself for making all the progress with the panic and anxiety, so the last thing I wanted to do was to be like… oh I’m in a shitty situation… but the reality of it was and is…I AM 

My job won’t be upping the hours anytime soon because its just a horribly ran business.  Im moving into a new apartment… theres nothing I can do about that…but hey, I never really was good friends with my roommate anyways.  And lets face it… Life has been pretty dead end here anyways.  I have been focusing on HOW WILL I GET THROUGH THE DAY because of the anxiety and panic… which was amazing at the time, and I really needed that period of sitting back and trying to make my life better each day because I was struggling each and every day.   But I’m not struggling anymore.  Im getting better and the OLD ME IS COMING BACK.  THAT ONE WHO WNATS TO CHANGE THE WORLD AND WILL STOP AT NOTHING TO DO IT

This trip home will be good for me.  I am now excited… VERY excited for it.  Refresh, restart, and renew.  Come back fighting and ready to change the world, because right now my legs are tense….my heart is beating fast… I’m fidgeting everywhere, cuz baby….

Im Ready To Run 

Play this and read on! 

So goodbye life, its been nice…..

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This whole ordeal and all… The ups and downs.  The wins and losses…. and to be honest, it needed to happen.  I needed this period of rebirth and regrowth.  Some real time to just recover from all the pain and trauma of the past….

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But I must bid you all adieu.   For Something is calling… something big and grand.   A world is in need of someone to shake it up.  Anger some people, and bring about change

So, so long, and thanks for all the fish.

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The Dark Horse

 

 

When Im Sick I want To Be An Evil Villain

bad

Yes thats right.  hate me if you must but when I’m sick I’m a raging bitch, because being sick is SOOOOOOO miserable for me and I feel like I’m sick ALLLLLLLLL the time.

So yes here is the truth, you want to know my kryptonite?  Its the common cold!  Or the flu, or strep throat.  Whatever Ive happened to get this week.

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Oh yes.  Like Nancy from the Craft, I lose my mind and am taken over by a higher force…. an evil one.   I just want to infect the world with the illness I have and watch them suffer and sneeze and cough and struggle to swallow!

DAMN YOU CHILDREN WITH YOUR FAST METABOLISMS!

And your good looks, and your never-ending source of energy and hormones…. why am I falling apart constantly on the inside and you aren’t?

When I’m sick my thoughts are about as innocent as Mr. Burns…. as I plan to burn down the house of that really smart girl from high school who went to a better school than me!

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Or that football player who was a faster runner than Ill ever be..

OR BETTER YET!

WHY NOT TAKE THE WHITE HOUSE? 

YES YES THATS IT!   Why play petty games when I can take over the world?   I want everyone to know what its like for me when I’m sick! So ill enslave the masses, force them into cannibalism, and have them worship me like a God.  Then I will crush every dream they ever had…..yes yes yes!!! SLOWLY! PAINFULLY!

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YES THATS IT!  BOW TO MY EVIL SUPREMACY! 

There is no hope for this world…. not when I’m sick!

I WILL DESTROY THE WORLD!!!!!! …..Soon…..well soonish….

Well, my throat hurts and I’m tired… and Ive just ordered Chinese takeout….

Ugh… and a steamy shower sounds nice……

Maybe Ill just destroy the world another day?

 

This post has not been proofread because EVIL MASTERMINDS have no need for proofreading!

The Dark Horse (Or, Evil Professor Captain Night Dark Horse to you minions!)

This Chapter Is Coming To A Close, Where Will I End Up?

fly

So in less than a week I will be boarding a plane for a little 3 week vacation to my hometown in Ohio.   But so many more changes are in the works.

The lease for our apartment is ending.  my roommate will be moving into his new apartment in about 2 days, and with him he will be taking his fridge, the wi-fi, and all his belongings…. which is pretty much everything.   I came to Australia with 1 suitcase and 1 duffle bag, so you can imagine how barren and dead the apartment will look for my last 4 days here.

Then the day before I leave I will move my stuff into my friends apartment where Ill be staying when I return.   Then its off to the hotel that I booked for one night before I go home.

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I will enjoy these 3 weeks at home.   Just really think about  EVERYTHING thats happened in this year so far.   The arrival in September, the panic and anxiety that consumed my life for so many months, the people I met, the jobs I had…. ugh… this annoying cafe job I have right now that I don’t want when I return, and this blog I started that actually makes me feel really good and proud!

But when I return it will be a whole new world here.  New apartment, Ill be looking for a new job because 2 days a week at this cafe isn’t paying the bills, new flatmates, and hopefully a new outlook on what I’ll do and where I’m going to go in life.

BUT CHANGE IS HARD ISNT IT? 

fly2

And its weird because I never felt that way before.  Anyone else out there with panic and anxiety feel like it really changed you and how you view life?  I used to love change and would jump at it…but now, even though though I still do it and obviously prefer an adventure rather than packing my bags and going home and staying home,  I kind of have this new feeling of… But I FINALLY feel like my life was getting into rhythm… why is it changing already? 

BUT NOW AS IM WRITING THIS IM LIKE…. BUT WAIT!!!!!! THAT RYTHM WAS BORING AS FUCK!  I NEED A CHANGE 

Anyone else have these conflicting feelings?

I guess what it is, is that the panic and anxiety showed me how low I can go, and now I just wonder and get afraid that it could happen again… that the possibility of change could bring out the badness inside me once more.

fly4

^ Thats me by the way…. Sometime I have to dress up as someones LESS famous than me at airports because the press loves to follow me everywhere (kidding… I just found this photo and thought it seemed really odd, so I was like… THATS GOING ON THE BLOG!)

Anyhoo, well yes, where was I…. um… oh yeah, conflict and adventure and whatnot.  SO YES! THATS IT!  I guess now that I’ve seen how far my body and mind can crumble, it makes me weary of any situation that could bring that out again.

However…… I do need to say…um…. Im getting the itch for adventure… despite my fears…. are you ready?

Ok here we go again…. Press play and then read on (its just a good ‘getting pumped’ song)

So look… yes, my dear bitches, it is time to face the fears and to rich shit out.  

Im growing stronger…. smarter….. wittier…. and more capable of handling the challenges ahead.

fly3

YES, the path to America and then back to Oz (get it? cuz Australia’s nickname is Oz… but I’m making reference to a storm and also to a better life so its like a play on words for the Wizard Of Oz…..ughhhhh…. never mind 😉 ) Anyhoo, the journey may be treacherous and scary.  It may be filled with storms and ups and downs but it will be worth it because A BETTER LIFE COULD AWAIT ON THE OTHER SIDE 

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With great risk comes great rewards…remember that.  If I had never believed in myself and never left my hometown and believed everyone when they told me nothing….. I can’t imagine where id be right now.   I left home 6 years ago…. 6 YEARS!  When i think of how much I have done in 6 years and how LITTLE I would have done had I stayed there it blows my mind. 

Think of that the next time you doubt yourself.   Think… well.. If I don’t try and don’t go for this… where will I probably be a year…. 3 years…. 5 years… from now?

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Just remember it aint over till the fat lady sings… and I aint fat nor am I a lady, so I guess the show must go on!

 

 

~ Winter Is Coming?  Winter Already Came Bitch, And We Survived!

THe Dark HorSE