Tag Archives: Music

Spring Playlist to Destroy the Winter Blues

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So, if you’re like me, then winter brings you down… a lot.  I have depression and anxiety, and I always have to work on on keeping myself mentally healthy. And winter is always the fucking hardest.

I love Christmas. The lights, the music, the food, how busy the world is… but then suddenly comes January and February.

No sun.

It’s freezing.

No holidays in sight.

Everyone is sick.

FUCK WINTER. 

FUCK IT INTO THE FUCKING GROUND.

But now, it’s spring. We are above freezing (sometimes only by a few degrees, but IT’S PROGRESS PEOPLE, COME ON!) And I’m getting myself all worked up for better weather, longer days, and the adventure that fills the sir of spring and summer.

I’ve crafted a kick-ass playlist that makes me smile, makes me happy, and gives me energy. This playlist screams SPRING IS HERE! 

If you’re looking for some good tunes to help bring you out of your winter hole, give these tunes a spin!

 

18 WHEELER

P!nk

When you need to just really kick some fuckin ass in the shower, turn on Pink’s 18 Wheeler. I’m lucky to have a window in my bathroom.  With this song, on weekend mornings, I like to hop in the shower after my morning tea and roll up the blinds so the morning sun has illuminated my bathroom, and THEN I BLAST THIS SHIT TILL THE BASS FALLS OUT. Nobody brings out your inner-rebellious teenager like pink.

 

NTH DEGREE

Morningwood

This is one of those songs that’s so great because it’s totally inappropriate. Just remember…

M O

M O R

M O R N I N G

M O – M O R- M O R N I N G W O O D TO THE NTH DEGREE!!!!!!

 

PORTLAND, OREGON

Jack White and Loretta Lynn

I hate that Loretta Lynn is a Trump supporter. But, you gotta give her credit for being 86 years old and still crankin’ out records and touring.  Also, this song is so good because it feels just like spring. The song starts of slow, and then builds and builds into the honkey tonk-infused tune that always gets me singing along.

 

BREAKFAST

Kelis

I’ll be honest with everyone, I didn’t like Kelis very much. I thought she was kinda trashy. But then her album Food came out, and I was blown away.  Here, she removes all that synth-hip-hop shit and just sings. And it’s beautiful.  The culmination of the song comes when she sings the line “Maybe we’ll make it to breakfast.” And I’m just like, YESSSSSSSS!  Maybe she’ll make it to breakfast, and maybe we’ll make it to spring!

 

1979

Smashing Pumpkins

This song brings back memories of warmer months as a kid in the 90’s. And it’s funny because 1979 is Billy Corgan singing about the dog days of his childhood, and this song came out in my childhood…so, it’s like…the circle of life or some shit like that.

Point is, the song envois images of youth, and hope for the future. Prefect for spring!

 

Storms in Africa Parts 1 & 2

Enya

I listen to these songs every single spring, and have ever since I was 15. The songs are about the African rainy season, when torrential thunderstorms bring water and life back to a parched region. This song always reminds me of spring rains. April showers do bring May flowers after all. I always love the energy of a spring storm. It’s like mother nature defibrillating herself back to life.

BETTER LIFE

Keith Urban

For anyone who has read this blog, you know I love running away/  And this song always inspire me to run again. The purity, the energy, and the hope of being young. The idea that adventure is everywhere. The belief that life is fun.

What can be more spring-like than that?

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The Macarena: The Most Diverse Music Video Ever

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Step aside all you obnoxious millennials who think you invented diversity. If you’re looking for the true trailblazer, you’ll need to go back… back to the 90’s. 

It was the summer of 1996. Independence Day was booming in the box office, The Craft had just been released that May, and Neve Campbell was about to be launched into an even further fame that December with Scream.

It was then, that an unsuspecting nation was introduced to the Macarena. Macarena fever hit hard. So hard in fact that even the DNC of that year was hit a Macarena outbreak.

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Since then, and this is embracing to admit…actually no it’s not, fuck all of you – I love the Macarena! It’s so damn catchy and so damn 90’s, it’s fuckin amazing.

So the other day, I was rewatching the Macarena music video (because yes, I do that. Got a problem? Call my agent!) and I was totally blown away.  I was like…

THIS WAS MADE IN THE 90s?

 

This music video is the very definition of diversity. And all of you 2019-ers should be ashamed of yourselves for not knowing about this important moment in music history.

Let’s meet our diverse cast:

 

The Singers

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The song is sung by Los Del Rio, a duo from Spain.  But look at this – How many hit music videos can you think of by men in their 50’s or 60’s dominating the charts? The Macarena directly combats agism!

 

The Brunette 

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Sure, blondes have more fun…but according to blondes! No matter what your hair color (or horrendous wardrobe choices…) all are welcomed to dance the Macarena!

 

The Indian Girl

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A study by PBS found that out of all the actors in Hollywood, only 4.2% are “Other”….yeah, that’s how disproportionate the number of Indian actors in Hollywood are. They’re categorized under “Other”, which would combine them with various Arab/Desi/Pacific Islanders/Indigenous peoples/and so forth…all to make up less than 5%.

pbs

So the true numbers of Indian actors will never be known.  What we do know that is that being Indian in the entertainment business can’t be easy. And being a woman in any job isn’t easy, so for an Indian woman to be featured in such a high-profile music video is huge!

This Girl… 

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I don’t what she is, or what the story behind the hair, the lips, and the outfit are…but here’s how I’m taking it – It’s all about being yourself.  She is the embodiment of body positivity, dressing how you want, and not giving a fuck.  Let’s all raise a glass and have a cheers to that cotton-candy wig!

The Latina

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Rocking out a satin pantsuit. That’s right – SATIN PANTSUIT –  A pantsuit so elegant, I can only imagine it would make Diane Keaton jealous. Our Latina (or Latinx, because I’m not here to assume genders) is surely ready for her night at the club where she will cheat on her boyfriend… you know… he one who’s name is Victorino.

But don’t worry,

She didn’t want him

She couldn’t stand him

He was no good so….

The Black Girl

(Can I still say ‘black’? I don’t want to say African American, because what if she isn’t from America?)

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Regardless of whatever the PC term is, one thing is for sure, I love this girl . That 90’s outfit, that Amazing 90’s hair. Everything. Pure perfection. Also, in the music video she competes to be the lead. Going head-to-head with…

 

The Asian Girl

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That shirt. That hair. That everything.  Oh man, 90’s perfection. This image isn’t too clear, but she’s also got on purple lipstick.  Daring and bold makeup choices…. UGHHHHHH THE 90s!!!! COME BACK!!!!!

 

The White Blonde Girl

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I know, I can hear you groaning. You’re probably saying something like #OscarsSoWhite, and then I’ll be like, that Oscars hashtag is from 2015. OMG get with it!  But in reality, diversity and inclusion means everyone…even white blonde women

(at least she’s not a man…am I right, ladies?????…crickets.)

Will that fabulous feather jacket help make it better?  Fit for a hooker, I say!

 

The Mom From ‘Blackish’

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The mom from Blackish denies being in the music video (yes, this got widespread enough  to where she had to respond) But, Macarena conspiracy theorists continue to insist that it’s her. And how could you not believe Macarena conspiracy theorists??????

The Scandinavian

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Had ABBA gotten famous in the 90’s they would have looked just like our Swedish girl in the music video. Plastic pants. Plastic shirt. And a plastic winter hat.  I have a feeling this was surely the most uncomfortbale outfit in the entire music video. But pain is beauty! 

 

The Jan

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Yes, that’s right. This music video is so diverse that it even has the forgotten middle child. Jan is so forgotten that I couldn’t even find a good image of this girl.  She’s literally hidden in ever single frame!

See, look!

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Let’s try again….

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Poor Jan. We can’t all be center stage though, I suppose.  I’m sure she has a great personality and is probably very smart.  Maybe she’s a lawyer now and making more than anyone else in the music video?

 

There you have it! The most diverse music video in the world! Now, put that song, and blast it loud!!! HEY MACARENA!!!!!

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Dance on my friends! Dance on!

 

~ The Dark Horse

Goodbye Earl (Or, Some Songs Just Make You Feel Ready To Kick Some Ass)

If you have never listened to and/or watched the music video for Goodbye Earl by The Dixie Chicks you are missing out.  It is one of those weird feel good yet wickedly evil at the same time type of songs.  Much like Kerosene by Miranda Lambert.

I won’t describe the song to you, instead here is the link, enjoy!

So do these songs have any importance? I mean it is seemingly a song full of hurt and lawless behavior right?

OH SO WRONG!

These songs blend sticking up for yourself with comedy!  They are (granted, in a sick and disturbed way) highly inspirational.

But as far as I’m concerned,  Ive kind of been through some stuff in my life and I have been treated like shit by tons of people.  So is it really oh so wrong that I find inspiration and comedy in a song about murder?  …Well i suppose you can all dictate that for yourselves.  I don’t think I’m crazy…(creepy wink)

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Whats my point here?

Well its that I think when you’re feeling down, or feeling like you can’t go on, really feeling like you need some help making it through the day, WELL FIND YOURSELF THAT SONG THAT IS JUST KICK ASS.  THAT ONE THAT WILL GIVE YOU THE STRENGTH TO GO ON

So what if it is a deeply demented yet highly entertaining song?  I mean, go for it!

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~The Dark Horse

Any of you have some kick ass songs that make you feel good?

Who Says You Cant Go Home? Or, Lets Get Our Passion Back!

 

going_home

Yes, lets talk bout this! 

So in 20 days I will be returning home to Ohio.  Hot, muggy, Middle-America.  And yes, I’m excited.

I heard Dolly Parton’s new song HOME last night and I’m already obsessed because its so true.  And its kind of weird too, because I will be the first person to shit on my hometown and talk about how Ohio is a hellhole.

And yet there is this odd affection for it.  I will always have the memories of my childhood and will always get that weird sense of relief whenever I see my house after months or years of being away.  Thats just how it is.  That is HOME. It is your good and it is your bad.  but it is YOU. 

home

Im hoping home brings me peace and allows me to refresh my mind.  I feel like Ive made a big turn these past 2 days.  The stuff Ive been worrying about just seems so trivial now because it is.  Im a hard worker.  If the job I’m working at falls through and I need to look for new work Ill manage.  If I have to leave to a new country ill embrace it as a chance for adventure and to make new friends, and maybe even meet the love of my life?

Going home will be good for me.  It will be a chance to remember what is important to me.

~ Having friends and finding love

~ Changing the world in hopes of it becoming better (even it is through small steps like this blog)

~ Experiencing adventure

~ Never compromising my beliefs

The rest is trivial.  What job i have in the meantime, where I’m living. What I’m wearing., and the rest of the bullshit.

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get up, dry those tears, and join me in not being afraid to live life anymore!  If death is coming than death is coming but until then Im going to try to be the best I can be!

~ Going Home

The Darj Horse

The House That Built Me

So here is another song by Miranda Lambert that I think is totally worth sharing.  There have been so many times in my life where this song has rang all too true to me.  Especially when I was living in LA.   Im sure a lot of you can relate to this song as well!  So even if you hate country or Miranda Lambert or whatever, put it all aside because this is a great song with listening to:

house

The song is basically about Miranda visiting her childhood home and thinking about how life has changed since she was a kid.

***Helpful Hint***  Get tissues! You may need them!

 

“I thought if I could touch this place or feel it
this brokenness inside me might start healing.
Out here its like I’m someone else,
I thought that maybe I could find myself
if I could just come in I swear I’ll leave.
Won’t take nothing but a memory
from the house that built me. “

When I was living in LA this song brought me to tears multiple times…in fact, before living in LA I hadn’t cried since I was 12 years old…. so I had gone almost 11 years without crying… but then when I got to LA and just took in perspective how awful my life was I just couldn’t hold it in.

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I was living this life I hated.  I was modeling which for any of you who dream of doing it, is a bullshit industry.  Especially for me, someone who has a very bad history with eating disorders.  I was letting out my depression and frustration with life by fucking everything I could.  Honestly…. if someone were to ask me how many men I have had sex with in my life it would definitely be over 100 and may even be over 200.  To this day Im constantly shocked and amazed I managed to survive LA without any STD’s or HIV.   I was living with roommates I hated. They were all college kids like me, yet somehow all managed to be horrible people. One of them was a pot addict/dealer (for all you annoying people who claim you don’t get addicted to pot, i don’t want to hear it. Your bullshit excuses might convince yourselves, but not me. He had to smoke up when he woke up, during his free time at school, when he got form school, after dinner, at midnight, and then once again at 2 or 3am before bed), the other was dealing with the death of his father and wasn’t handling it well. He became extremely violent, especially when drunk.  The other was spoiled rich kid who was a crystal addict with his girlfriend he met in rehab…. he later ran away and was never seen again.  There 3 others who aren’t worth mentioning.

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ANYWAY the point is… when i heard that lyric “I thought if I could touch this place or feel it,  this brokenness inside me might start healing. Out here its like I’m someone else” you can imagine that I literally just broke down. Uncontrollably. I remember.  I was on a city bus. I literally broke down on a bus listening to this song. I remember it perfectly. i was coming back from school after a really late night studying. For any of you who know LA Ill map this out for you. Im on Wilshire.  Trying to hold my shit together heading from Santa Monica to my apartment in Westwood.  We cross the 405 and I can’t hold it in anymore. The tears just start coming. I can’t breathe. Im so weak I can’t imagine living another second. Everyone is looking at me.  I get off the bus a stop early because I can’t handle all the people looking at me.  Im stumbling home. Probably looking like some kind of cracked out drug addict. I can’t go back to my room because my roommates are the last people in the world I want to see me like this. So I go to the roof of my building and just collapse.

Have you ever collapsed before?  Have you ever just been filled with this combination of I can’t go on and I don’t want to go on? And so you just stop…. Your body and mind are done.   It is the most hopeless feeling in the entire world. It is the loneliness, dirtiest, messiest feeling you’ll ever have.  You have the thought “Im going to die here, right now.  Sad, alone, and right.  Right about everything.  Right that life means nothing. Right that I would never find anyone who cares. Right that this whole thing was pointless.”

“You leave home, you move on and you do the best you can.
I got lost in this whole world and forgot who I am. But I didn’t die.”

But I didn’t die.  Somehow I got a second chance at life.  It was that moment I knew what I had to do.  I had to leave LA.  Yes.  LA was my dream.  It always had been.  To escape my hometown in Ohio and make it to LA.  To get into the entertainment industry.  To make movies to change the world…. But it wasn’t working out.  It was killing me.  Everything was wrong. I was in the worst physical and mental state I had ever been in.

If I wanted to live I needed to take a chance and jump. Go somewhere else.  Meet new people.  I had to learn when things just weren’t going where I needed them to go.

I spent about 6 months in LA like that as I finished up school, planned what to do next, and just dream of surviving it all. Constant breakdowns.  Alienation from everything I ever loved.  Dreading each day I woke up.

I ran away after that.  I needed to.

I ran to the woods of the Northwest Territories.  I literally lived in the woods with 8 other people in a plywood box covered in arctic-tarp for insulation.   And now here I am in Australia…. its crazy though how the memories of LA seem so close still.  So fresh and so vivid.  Im anxious right now writing this post.  My heart is beating faster and I’m a bit wobbly.  It’s just a place I never want to return to. Physically and mentally.

“I know they say you cant go home again.
I just had to come back one last time.”

In less than a month Ill be returning to Ohio for a few weeks to visit home.  How will it be?  Everything Ive learned here.  Everything Ive been through here in Australia.  The good and the bad.   How will this change home for me?  What will it be like?

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Good, bad, Indifferent?

Well, the tickets are booked and I’ve spent a lot of money on them, so questioning won’t do anything at this point… I’m going.

We shall see what happenes

~The Dark Horse

Songs For An Anti-Caziness Shower!

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So back when I first started blogging I made a post for something called an “anti-craziness shower”.  Here is the link: https://youshouldseemyscars.wordpress.com/2013/12/18/some-inspiration-otherwise-known-as-the-anti-craziness-shower/

Basically whenever you’re feeling down follow those simple steps and you will feel like a new man (or woman) afterwards! 

The point of this blogpost is to give you amazing songs to listen to while taking your anti-craziness shower.  These are guaranteed to get your blood pumping once more, bring a smile to your face, and help you remember that there will in fact be a tomorrow! 

Lets go!

Lose Myself by Lauryn Hill 

 

This song is wonderful!  Its all about being true to yourself and finding the better person who lives within!  A must-have choice for any good anti-craziness shower! 

 

Under The Sea from The Little Mermaid 

Oh yeah thats right… I’m saying it! HAVE YOU EVER SHOWERED TO THIS SONG??? NO??? THEN DONT BASH IT! You’ll feel amazing and happy afterwards! Sometimes we all need a little Disney break (in no way am I supporting the plot of this movie though… I think it has many terrible lessons).  

 

Elephant Love Medley from Moulin Rouge 

Oh yes. I will admit… songs don’t get much gayer than this…. maybe only rivaled in gayness by a Cher concert in Palm Springs, but the point is this is song is AWESOME! Its just great in every way!  You will smile and feel great and probably sing along (yes straight men you will… you don’t have to admit to me or to anyone else..but in the privacy of you’re on shower you will sing along, I’m not stupid) 

 

Nth Degree by Morningwood 

Slightly inappropriate? yes sure… Insanely fun? OH HELL YA!  This song’s driving beat paired with campy lyrics will compliment the fun and comfort of a steamy shower perfectly! 

 

Send Me On My Way by Rusted Root

yes its the song you all know and love! But have you ever played it in the shower?  It opens up a whole new experience that is sure to please! 

 

Powerless by Nelly Furtado

Amazing song that somehow slipped under the radar.  This was from Nelly Furtado’s second album… or as I see it, her last album before becoming modern-pop-trash. 

 

God Is A DJ by P!nk

great great great great song!  listen enjoy and rock out! 

 

Alright there you have it! Your anti-craizness shower playlist!  Now get going! 

 

~ The Dark Horse